Return
by candi711
Summary: A person from Amanda's past returns unexpectedly and causes trouble for her and the team.
**Disclaimer: I do not own Law and Order: SVU or any of its characters**

 **A/N: Dodds Jr is not going to be in this story because I do not know how to write him. Be warned I am dyslexic so there may be some mistakes in spelling and grammar that slipped through, spell check can only do so much.**

Amanda stopped before entering the squad room, she took a deep breath hoping her coworkers would buy her story and leave her alone for the day. "Better get this over with" she whispered to herself as she entered the room

"Hey Rollins" Fin greeted her, barely looking up from his desk "Liv wants us to finish up the paperwork for the Carson case before lunch, hopefully, no calls will come in and we can go home early"

"Ya ok" the blonde detective responded as she headed to her desk trying to keep her face hidden from his view.

Fin noticed the stiff posture of his partner and tried to inspect her better "what the hell!" he yelled as he jumped from his chair and hurriedly walked to the young detective "who hit you, Manda!" He yelled as he reached his hand up to lightly graze the dark bruise on Amanda's left cheek, a bruise that she tried to cover with makeup but ultimately failed. The young detective jerked away from his hand, an action that only caused her partner to become even more worried.

"It's nothing Fin," Amanda said as she put her stuff down on her desk "just a little scratch"

"A scratch?" the dark-skinned detective repeated mockingly "have you seen your face this morning?" he continued not willing to drop this subject until he was given a satisfactory answer, preferably one that gave him the name of the bastard who hurt her so he could give it back to him tenfold.

"What is going on out here?" Benson said in a raised voice as she exited her office with Carisi right behind her, drawn out by the loud commotion in the squad room. Amanda turned her head away from the newcomers if only to delay the inevitable for a few seconds longer.

"Rollins was attacked last night" Fin answered pointing to his partner with his thumb. The blonde detective hated how the team's eyes landed on her. She started to shake her head as she used her left hand to hold the side of her face "that's not what happened" she tried to explain"

"Wait, someone hurt you Rollins" Carisi interrupted her as he stepped toward the blonde in order to get a better look at her

"No, no one hurt me. It was an accident" She tried to explain quickly "I was helping out someone from the program and I ended up taking a little tumble" she tried to sound nonchalant.

"If someone did this to you Rollins we need to know, I won't let one of my detectives be assaulted" Benson broke in, not satisfied with Amanda's answer "there is no excuse for hitting you"

"Guys it wasn't like that" Rollins continued "I wasn't assaulted, this is no big deal. Please can we just get on with today and leave this alone"

"Fine" Benson sighed "we'll leave this alone for now" she emphasized the 'now'. "Everyone back to work, I want all the paperwork for the Carson case on my desk as soon as possible". Benson then ushered her detectives off to their own desks, she casually made her way to her young blonde detective "Amanda, you know that if there's anything wrong you can always come to me, right" she said in a soft and inviting tone

"I know lieutenant" Rollins answered "but really, this is no big deal"

Olivia nodded and walked away, seemingly accepting her response. She made her way to her unofficial number two "Fin" she put a hand on his shoulder and leaned close to his ear "keep an on eye on her"

"You don't have to tell me twice"

* * *

No new cases came in that day giving the team a rare opportunity to head home early. "Hey guys I'm headed to O'Hanagins for a beer, first round's on me" Carisi stated to the room as he grabbed his coat.

"Hell ya I'm in" Fin answered quickly "I never say no to a free drink"

"I could go for a little while, Lucy said she put Noah down early for bed today" Benson added as she went to stand with the guys

"Rollins, you in," Carisi asked the blonde noticing that she had yet to respond

"Thanks, but no" she answered as she turned off her computer "it's not often we get off early and I'd like to spend the time with Jesse"

"Aw come on, have some fun once in a little while" Carisi whined, trying to get the whole team out for once

"Carisi" Olivia chided "when you have your own kid, you'll learn that time with them is precious"

"Him, have any children?" Fin laughed as he stuck a thumb out toward the male detective "I have a better chance of marrying the Queen of England"

"Hey," Carisi yelled as the team laughed at his expense.

Later at the bar the three SVU detectives were enjoying spending time together without having to deal with the harsh reality that was their jobs. "and so my ma said 'next time you want to go rock climbing, make sure you wear pants'" Carisi laughed as he finished telling a story from his childhood

"Man, I don't know how you ended up making it to adulthood," Fin said as he took another sip of his beer, noticing he was almost out. He raised his hand to get the bartender's attention. He gained the owners instead.

O'Hanagins was a small family owned bar, it wasn't run down but it wasn't too expensive. Just the right place for a couple of cops to relax and buy a few drinks "how's everything going over here officers" the owner stated as he reached the group. He loved that cops liked to attend his bar, he even gave them discounts. He reasoned who better to have on site if any trouble was to go down.

"Great as always" Benson smiled to be polite "but it would be perfect if we could get another round"

"Coming right up" the owner responded as he went to gather their drinks "I know it's none of my business but how's your friend doing after yesterday" he questioned as he returned

The grouped looked at each other in confusion. "What'cha mean?" Fin asked

"Well that blonde detective of yours was here last night and seemed to have her hands full with some aggressive guy" he answered like he was surprised that they were unaware

"Amanda was here yesterday," Benson asked and the owner nodded "what exactly happened?"

"Well she came here and seemed to be waiting for someone" he started as he leaned closer to the group not wanting to be overheard by the other patrons around "She didn't even drink anything but water. Then all of a sudden a guy came in, already drunk and sat by her. I didn't want to eavesdrop, it's none of my business anyhow, but they seemed to be arguing. So I started to approach the two telling the man to calm down. He started to curse at me, and your friend seemed to be trying to calm him down. Suddenly he turned on her with an angry look and grabbed her arm and led them both out the door. I tried to follow them, but they were already gone by the time I walked outside. I figured since she's a cop she could handle herself, didn't stop me from being worried though" As the owner finished his story the SVU detectives shared a concerned glance. They thanked the owner as he left to tend to more customers.

The group stayed quiet for a few moments, absorbing what they just heard "son of a bitch" Fin said as he slammed his drink down on the bar "so that's how she got the bruise, I'm going to kill the bastard who hurt her"

"I'm right there with you" Carisi agreed "but why wouldn't she tell us the truth"

"Rollins has always been a private person" Benson answered thinking about her young detective, wondering what trouble she had gotten herself into this time

"Well let's go visit her and find out" Fin quickly stated as he grabbed his coat to leave

"Wait up" Benson said as she grabbed the larger detective arm, stopping him from moving "right now none of us are in a condition to ask her about this. I will talk to her first thing in the morning. Now it's time for all of us to head home" her response was met with some grumbling from the guys "and that's an order"

* * *

The next morning Benson came in early to be ready to grab the blonde detective as soon as she entered the squad room. She sat at her desk trying to think of possible reasons for Rollins to be in trouble again, all of them bad "please don't be gambling again" she whispered to herself, believing this angry man to possibly be a bookie. A sudden voice startled her from her musing as she noticed the blonde enter the building "Rollins can I speak to you for a moment" Benson said leaning against her door, not really asking but ordering.

"What do you need, Liv" Amanda asked as she entered the room

"Can you shut the door please" Benson asked and the blonde detective nodded while she completed the task, slightly worried for usually nothing good ever came after doing so

"Amanda, I know that we have some trust issues between us, but I really meant it when I said you could always come to me if you needed anything"

"What do you mean Liv? I'm fine" Amanda answered confused about the reason for this discussion

"I know you met someone in the bar two nights ago, the same person I assume gave you that bruise on your cheek" the brunette stated matter of factly

"Wait that's what this is about" Rollins quickly answered "I already told you that was someone from the program who needed some help, he didn't mean to hurt me"

"I know what you said Amanda, but a witness at the bar said that the man roughly dragged you out" Benson said as she leaned back on the front of her desk "tell me the truth, Amanda, are you gambling again?"

Rollins face dropped, she was angry and shocked but tried to keep it in "Oh God no Olivia" she quickly explained "I would never jeopardize Jesse for that, my job. I would rather die then put my daughter through what I had to grow up with"

Benson seemed to believe the sincerity of her voice "then what was it that happened that night at the bar, who gave you that bruise?" she questioned still concerned about her detective's safety

Before Amanda could answer there was a knock at the door "sorry to interrupt" Carisi said as he stuck his head through the door "but we have a victim at an AA meeting on 22nd street"

"Alright" Benson sighed "you and Amanda go, but we're not done talking here" she finished looking at the blonde.

* * *

"The victim's name is Clair Duggard, a 27 year old woman who moved from Arizona 6 months ago" an officer explained to them as they arrived on the scene "we were called to the scene because of an altercation between Ms. Duggard and the alleged perpetrator, in the middle of this fight Duggard yelled that the perp raped her two nights ago"

"So we have the suspect in custody?" Carisi questioned

"Ya we sent him down to the precinct already, he'll be booked and ready to be questioned by the time you return to your station" the officer said

"Wait you already arrested him" Rollins asked "I know the vic I.D him, but he hasn't even started our investigation"

"We didn't arrest him for the rape detective, we arrested him for assault" the officer explained "the perp was able to land several blows to Duggard before we were able to arrive, we also have several wittiness that can corroborate the story"

"Thanks for your work officer we'll take it from here" Carisi said as they were about to reach the victim who was being seen by the paramedics

"Claire Duggard?" Rollins asked the young woman being tended "I'm detective Rollins and this is detective Carisi, we would like to ask you a few questions, if that'll be alright with you" she said in a soft and non-threatening voice

"Ya its ok" Claire said quietly

"Can you tell us what happened?" Carisi asked

"Well I moved here not long ago from Arizona" she began "I was already in the program there and continued it when I came to New York. I met this guy who offered to be my sponsor, and at first he was wonderful, but recently he seemed to be going through a rough patch. He seemed to want to make our relationship more than just sponsorer and sponsoree, but I didn't want that. Then he just fell off the wagon, and although I wanted to help him I couldn't. Suddenly two nights ago he asks me to meet him, god I was so stupid. Why would I meet him?" Claire began to berate herself

"You're not stupid honey" Rollins began to sooth the young woman "you couldn't have known he would hurt you, he was once your sponsor" She understood the level of trust a person could have with their sponsor "now where did you meet him?"

"Now here's the really strange part, my sponsor, a recovering alcoholic, owned his own bar, and that's where I meet him" Amanda gave an involuntary shudder at this, thinking of her own previous sponsor, Nate. "He was drunk by the time I arrived, it was nearly 6 in the morning and I was going to catch a meeting before I went to work, but that's when he…he" she stuttered, Rollins gave her a sympathetic rub on her arm and told her to take her time "he raped me" Claire took a deep breath and continued "I ran out of his bar as soon as possible, I went home and took a shower, I called in sick. I just wanted to forget about it. I was going to forget about it until he showed up at my meeting this morning… still drunk telling me that we need to hook up again" she sobbed as she finished telling her story

"What is the man's name" Carisi asked "the man who attacked you?"

"Nate Davis"

* * *

"This piece of crap again," Fin said as she stood outside the interrogation room looking at Nate as he sat alone at the table

"I know, I also hoped we had seen the last of him," Benson said as she turned to face Rollins and Carisi "Amanda, you know with your history you can no longer be a part of this case, right"

"I know lieutenant" she answered "but can I at least watch from out here?" Benson nodded as Fin and Carisi entered the interrogation room

"Long time no see Nate," Fin said sarcastically as he sat down at the table, opposite the drunken man

"Not long enough if you ask me" Nate snarkily replied

"Well, the feelings mutual" Fin retorted "now where were you two days ago?"

"Well" Nate started "I was having a grand ole' time with several women, not that either of you would know what that's like" he sneered

"Well it seems that one of those women are claiming you raped them at your bar" Carisi interrupted

"You mean Claire? That whore wanted to sleep with me" Nate responded proudly

"That's not her story, she said you forced her and then showed up at her meeting today to force her again" Fin quickly added causing Nate face to contort in anger

"That whore is lying" he said as he pounded his fists on the table, he looked up and peered at the two-way mirror "Amanda!" he yelled "get your ass in here and tell them they're wrong, I saved your ass so many times it's time for you to help me out like you said you would two nights ago"

"Amanda's not going to talk to you" Fin yelled to get Nate's attention "and what do you mean like she promised? You met up with her recently?"

"Oh, so she didn't tell you?" Nate sneered again "we met up at a bar and I tried to ask for her help, I just needed some company for the night but she tried to say no"

At his statement Fin became angry and grabbed Nate from across the table "what did you do to my partner" he yelled as he shook him, Carisi quickly stood up and tried to separate the two

"I obviously didn't do anything she didn't want or else she would have told you, huh"

"You bastard" Fin yelled again, this time he was able to slam Nate's head onto the table "you left a bruise on her face, you hurt her"

"Oh she can take worse," Nate said a bit dazed from the blow "she likes it rough, or at least she did whenever we slept together, do you want me to tell you every sordid detail of our sex life"

"What is he talking about, Amanda?" Benson asked her blonde detective from behind the glass

"I didn't sleep with him, Liv, I swear" Rollins quickly tired to explain, attempting to hide her embarrassment from what Nate was telling her coworkers "We did meet at the bar two nights ago and he was drunk, he wanted company for the night but I wasn't going to walk down that path, especially for Jesse" her face softened at the thought of her daughter "I dropped him off at a detox center so he could sober up, and in the process he was able to land a punch"

"Amanda" Benson started with sympathetic eyes "did he do anything else, did he force you to…" she was cut off by the blonde detective "No Liv he didn't rape me, he didn't touch me save for the bruise" Amanda paused for a moment "perhaps if I would have let him sleep on my couch Claire wouldn't have been raped" she finished sadly

"No Amanda, you can't think like that" Benson said sternly but kindly "If you would have done that then there's no telling what he would have done to you, or Jesse for that matter" Rollins nodded, understanding that she would have never let Nate stay at her place in that state, especially if Jesse was there

"It's just hard to believe that Nate would rape someone" Rollins said looking straight at the man in question "he's very popular among the women at the meeting, he's never had trouble gaining their attention" she looked down at the floor knowing that she fell in that category "the women that attend those meeting are vulnerable, and easily seduced, I just don't understand why he would take the risk and force someone when he had other options"

"The fact that he used the meetings as his hunting ground only proves that he has been a predator for a long time, Amanda" Olivia exclaimed "he finally ran into someone who said no and decided to overpower her, the same thing that I think he tried to do to you, but you were stronger than him"

"You ok, Manda" Fin asked as he and Carisi left the interrogation room

"Ya I am fine, he's lying I didn't sleep with him two nights ago" she tried to explain to the guys, hoping they didn't buy the story Nate was feeding them

"No worries boo, we got your back and trust in your words over this loser," Fin said as he placed his hand on Amanda's shoulder

"Well I think we have all that we're going to get out of him," Carisi said "I think it's time to get Barba involved"

"I think your right Carisi" Benson said "but we're going to be adding assault on a police officer to his crimes"

"Wait you don't have to do that" the blonde detective tried to protest

"No" Benson interrupted "I want him to be brought to justice on everything he did wrong, to you and to Claire, besides her case is going to be hard enough, it's going to be a he-said-she-said case"

"Ya and unfortunately pretty boy there seems to be a smooth talker when he's sober" Fin said but quickly added "don't worry Manda, we're going to make sure these charges stick"

* * *

Several days later, on a Saturday morning, Amanda was sitting at a table, with Jesse asleep in a stroller next to her, on an outside patio of a coffee shop. She was waiting to meet Carisi there so the three of them could hang out for the day. The blonde detective, although she may not be so forthcoming about it, loves the fact that her coworkers act as her surrogate family, always being there for her; even planning days like today to allow Jesse out of the house for a while.

Amanda looked down at her sleeping daughter and recalled the hectic week they just had. Barba had decided to take Nate's case to trial and even added stocking to the charges. Even with everything against him, the judge set bail at 10 thousand dollars, due to Nate having no prior record and an extraordinary track record in helping people before these recent events. With his resources, it came as no surprise that he was able to make bail.

"Amanda" the blonde heard her name being called from behind her. She turned around expecting to see Carisi but instead found Nate "you need to drop the charges, Amanda, you know people make mistakes when they fall off the wagon, you should understand that most of all"

"I understand that Nate" Amanda said as she stood to met him, putting herself as a barrier between Jesse and the angry man before her "but that's no excuse to hurt people"

"Like I said I didn't hurt anyone" Nate tried to explain clenching his fists "Claire wanted it, and if she says anything else she's lying"

"Well that's going to have to be up to the jury to decide" Amanda said trying to keep him calm

"A jury?" he scoffed "I shouldn't have to leave my fate up to some idiots who were too dumb to get out of jury duty"

"You don't have a choice in that matter Nate; it's out of both our hands now" the blonde said as she noticed passerbyers becoming aware of their argument "and now I suggest you leave before you get arrested for attempting to tamper with a witness"

"Don't lie to me Amanda" Nate shouted "I know you have the ability to stop all of this and that's exactly what you're going to do" he continued as he pulled a gun from his jacket "even if I have to force you to do so"

The blonde detective froze putting her hands up in a non threatening pose as patrons of the coffee shop noticed the gun and started to run for cover "you don't have to do this Nate" she tried to negotiate

"Yes" he said as he shook the gun in frustration pointing directly at her "yes I do, because it seems you only know how to react when someone is forcing you to do so"

From somewhere behind her Amanda heard someone yell "Rollins!" she did not turn around she kept all of her focus on the dangerous man in front of her. Nate, however, did notice the newcomer causing him to become momentarily distracted. Amanda used this to her advantage and grabbed the hand that held the gun and raised it in the air. She took her left hand and hit Nate's extended right elbow at the joint, causing it to bend the wrong way and him to drop the gun. As Nate crumbled to his knees in pain Rollins lifted her knee to connect with his face, instantly knocking him out "that's for bringing a gun near my daughter you bastard"

"Amanda, are you alright" Carisi ran to her "what the hell happened"

"Ya I'm fine, and this genius came here and tried to have me drop all the charges against him," she said as she secured the gun and handcuffed Nate not caring about his broken elbow "and well this is the result"

The police arrived quickly to take over. "Poor guy," Carisi said absentmindedly as Nate was taken away by the paramedics.

"What do you mean" Amanda questioned "he came here with a gun, why would you have sympathy for him"

"It's just that he had his life together not that long ago" Carisi looked at his partner "if he didn't fall off the wagon and lose control like that his life might not be over, with everything he's done Nate's looking at a long stretch in jail" he shook his head as he went to kneel down by Jesse's stroller wanting to double check again to see if she was ok "it's terrible what addiction can do to someone"

It was quiet for several long moments. Carisi looked up in the silence to see Rollins struggle to keep her face blank, realizing what he just said he began to kick himself mentally "Amanda, I wasn't talking about you, you don't have to worry"

"How can you be so sure Dom?" she questioned as she looked him in the eyes "Nate was sober for years, he had a long history in the program, if he could just snap like this when he fell off the wagon, what hope do I have of staying clean"

"First of all, you and Nate are completely different people" Carisi stated as he put both of his hands on Amanda's shoulders for support "from what I've heard, he has a history of using people to get what he wants, even if he tried to disguise it in a noble light. Secondly, he does not have the same reasons to stay sober as you do" Carisi said looking toward Jesse "I know for a matter of a fact that you would never do anything that would jeopardize her future. Finally, you have a great support system built up with us. I will always be here for you, you know there is no questioning if Fin's got your back, and I know that you and the lieutenant may have had some trust issues in the past but she is also there for you and has said as much to your face several times"

Amanda nodded her head in agreement "logically I understand everything you just said, but emotionally…" she trailed off for a moment and bit her lip before continuing "you don't understand the pull there is to just give in, it doesn't go away, that's why it's so important to continue going to GA but with people like Nate there it just taints the experience"

"He only taints it if you let him," Carisi said "don't give him that power over you Rollins" he chuckled as he continued "besides you certainly already proved that you can kick his ass up and down the block if you really wanted to"

The blonde detective smiled at this, remembering how satisfying it felt to knock Nate to the ground, especially after what he put her through as her sponsor.

"I know exactly what you need Amanda" Carisi suddenly spoke up

"Ya, and what would that be?" she inquired with a smirk wondering what her partner thinks could make her feel better

"A nice home cooked meal" he stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world "We'll spend the day together like we first planned and then I'll take you back home and cook you a homemade lasagna. When was the last time you had a home cooked meal anyways?" Carisi questioned

"The last time you came over and cooked" Amanda laughed

"Wow you really need to learn to cook for yourself Rollins," Carisi said light-heartedly "if not for your sake then for Jesse's"

"Why would I need to learn if you're always going to be here to cook for us." She said as she raised an eyebrow, reminding him of his promise to always be there, a promise he made only moments ago. They both laughed as they set out to fulfill the day's activities, allowing themselves, if only for the moment, to forget about the drama of their lives and their jobs, but just embrace the company of their loved ones.

 **A/N: Well this was a quick story that just popped inside of my head after watching the latest episode of SVU. I thought it was so cute that Amanda asked Carisi over for dinner to cheer him up, only to make him be the one to cook it for them. I hope I am not the only one who never liked Nate; he just seemed like a predator because he was picking up women at those meeting, women who may be vulnerable and at a weak point in their lives. For that reason alone I just hated him, o.k. so enough of that little rant. I did not start out shipping Rollisi in this story but it just ended up that way I guess. In my opinion, I think that Rollins and Carisi have so much better chemistry than her and Amaro. Rollaro had to me seemed to have a more passionate and aggressive feel to it, but never nurturing, at least with Rollisi they seem to be connected. Thanks for taking the time to read my story, please tell me what you think :)**


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